Princess Tomorrow in her dress from Auntie J on TPR Day
On the mini trampoline...looks like she was concentrating on being safe for her "Aunt Den"
With her Case Worker from Denver Human Services on his last visit
He's leaving the department and he said he was really glad that he got to see her case mostly resolved-- and he said it's the best "success story" he's seen!
It appears I've been on vacation from blogging. We've just been really busy, to say the least. The vegetable garden ate up our July, and we've spent our weekends staycationing and taking daytrips around Colorado as much as possible.
The nice thing is that no news really is good news. Hopefully you, my faithful readers, know that about my blogging style by now. There hasn't been any calamity, drama, gossip or problems with visits to vent about. We've finally gotten a chance to babymoon and enjoy being a family with OUR little girl without the intrusion of the weekly, court-ordered visits. I always knew they were disruptive, and now I know full well exactly how disruptive they were. Tomorrow has almost completely stopped hitting and kicking, and she doesn't cry hysterically whenever I say, "Let's do your hair, okay?"
Then there's the fact that HAVING THREE ACTIVE KIDS IS KICKING MY BUTT. When Mike talks about wanting to adopt a sister for Tomorrow someday, I remind him that the only way I will be willing to adopt another child is if she has Down Syndrome or for some other reason has a below average IQ. Please don't take offense to this if you have a child with Down's Syndrome. I worked for six years with adults with developmental disabilities and have said I think we "normal" people are the ones with the messed-up genes, because never before have I felt so appreciated and unconditionally loved for who I really am regardless of my car, clothing, et cetera than I was by my clients with Down's Syndrome. And anyway, MY POINT IS: I don't need any more "high functioning" and intelligent children to raise! I have my work cut out for me already.
There's literally not enough time in the day for all things the kids want to do plus what I feel like I need to do. The one downside to unschooling is that we are always learning! A love of learning is something that once illuminated cannot be dimmed. Our children are so very curious and they want to know EVERYTHING. TODAY. I can spend all day long helping them research things they want to know more about (currently teeth as Hammy lost his second one last night) while sneaking in the things that the state of Colorado says they need to know, and still they go to bed asking questions.
We're also recertifying as a foster family/home this month so we've been busy with CPR and First Aid refreshers, planned and surprise home inspections, paperwork (the same paperwork we filled out last year, but we have to fill it out again even if nothing has changed) including making copies of anything they have lost since last year, our annual S.A.F.E. questionnaires (in which they ask the most personal questions you can imagine of each spouse separately and then they compare our answers), and private interviews with the kids.
The answers the kids gave in their interviews were funny. First of all, when it came time for the Case Manager to interview the kids they were all sucked into Wii, because we had had to keep them occupied while we were doing our interviews. Plus it was dinnertime. Then there's the fact that Hammy and Moose are so over Tomorrow it's as if she's already ours. When the Case Manager asked them how they are doing, they both said "Great" without even looking away from the TV screen. When she asked how Tomorrow is doing, they said, "Pretty good" and "Okay, I guess." When asked what happens when they get in trouble, Hammy said, "We have to sit on the steps-- or if I'm really rude to my mom, then I can just go to my room." She asked what happens when Tomorrow gets in trouble and Hammy said, "My mom says she isn't really old enough to get in trouble yet but SHE IS TROUBLE. And if she hits us, then she has to sit on the bottom step 'cause she's one." When she asked if they had any needs, Hammy said, "Not anymore since I got one-on-one time with my parents back and I get an allowance." And Moose said, "I get one-on-one time but I need an allowance." And when she asked them if there is anything Tomorrow needs, Hammy said, "One-on-one time. She doesn't really get any." HA! We spend so much one-on-one time together sometimes I think we're one person. But I know what he meant, it's not like I take her to the park to shoot hoops and get a cherry limeade from Sonic or anything like I do with him and maybe I should. But she goes on errands all the time with her daddy (because she'll cry hysterically and shake violently if she can't go).
Considering the things our kids could have said, their interviews went really well! No one said anything about the time I locked myself in the bathroom, crying, and told Mike that I was going to go stay in a hotel until the boys stopped fighting constantly. I'm sure they know to take what the kids say in context of their age, but I bet they get some really funny answers. I'd love to hear some of the funnier ones.
And finally, because I know some of you are/were wondering, the status of the adoption process right now is kind of in a holding pattern but still headed in the right direction. We're so used to it. We have a post-termination hearing on September 3, and mom is appealing the way her case was handled by the department so we really haven't officially even started the adoption process. The new Case Worker with the county said that our adoptive homestudy that's on file with our licensing agency ought to be sufficient but that they usually ask a few more questions, do a "Presentation of the Child" to tell us what her long-term needs will be, and finalize the amount of our montly stipend. Turns out we will get a small monthly stipend even after adoption, which was news to us and is a comfort since adding a third child on one income is scary in these times.
OH! And the department is not recommending contact with the family including the birth mom, so I don't have to feel guilty if I never speak to her again or fret over the fact that we've decided not to go with an open adoption (more on that later).
Well my peeps, that's all the news I've got for now. We've really got to get crack-alackin' on planning Tomorrow's second birthday bash, because it's in eleven days, we're having it here, and our yard is an overgrowth of weeds not unlike the high plains when the pioneers first crossed them.
I hope YOUR Summer is wrapping smoothly, and flows into a lovely Autumn!
