I called Leah with LFS Friday, and set up a home visit for this Friday evening, but after thinking it over this weekend I have changed my mind once again and decided I would rather go with Ariel Clinical Services.
I think they are a smaller agency, with a lot less overhead, and they just have a vibe that we like. The agency reminds me a lot of the small non-profit I worked for right out of college, Community Living, Inc.
Besides we already have all of our Ariel forms filled out- we just need to get our fingerprint cards done and find a doctor who can see the whole family in one visit. I am hoping we can get an appointment with a doctor at a family practice right down the street. I have agreed to arrange the doctor's appointment and Mike will make an appointment for getting our fingerprints.
Also, if I didn't already mention this: LFS is "absorbing another agency" which sounds cannibalistic but apparently happens a lot with CPA's and seems to cause chaos.
We asked our oldest son how would he like having an older sister, and he said, "I would like her if she combs her hair, listens, brushes her teeth and plays with me."
We'll see what we can do!
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
On the couch
I'm not calling LFS today because I have finally succumbed to this cold and am on the couch. The boys are playing really well together and it's time like this when I question why we want to add a third child to our family. Why is it so important for me to have a daughter? And is it a sexist need?
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Lutheran Family Services is stalking us!
I had called them to get some information on their foster program (that was never sent). I played phone tag with one woman and now another woman called me today! I am not Lutheran, and maybe it doesn't matter, but I tend to go with secular organizations. Although my first contact with the foster community here- a woman I spoke with at McDonald's of all places, while we were living in the hotel in Greenwood Village- recommended LFS. Of course, she was Lutheran! But I still think I may call her. She gave me her number on a napkin and said, "I know what it's like to move to a place where you don't know anyone so feel free to call me about anything."
NoBloPoSun
I didn't blog at all on Sunday, not because it was the Sabbath, but because I was up until 3 a.m. taking photos of new items for our business website and of various things that I am now auctioning on eBay, and my sons have a cold which they are sharing nicely, and I just took the day off and vegged out and let the house get really messy. I watched Rugrats Go Wild with the boys and loved every minute of it. I vowed to do that every Sunday from.now.on.
Nonetheless, since I didn't blog yesterday, I will share a quote from the day: "You are not allowed to take doors apart, Mister!" Mike said that to one of our sons. They both seem to have minds like engineers, and like to take things apart but can't always get them back together.
Nonetheless, since I didn't blog yesterday, I will share a quote from the day: "You are not allowed to take doors apart, Mister!" Mike said that to one of our sons. They both seem to have minds like engineers, and like to take things apart but can't always get them back together.
Why do we want more kids? you may be asking. Because rules were made to be broken, that's why. "There's room for one more..." ~MATISYAHU
Mike finished his "SAFE" Questionnaire, so now we just have to find a doctor to see the whole fam, get fingerprinted, and wait for our criminal background checks to be performed. For me, it will be like sort of like waiting to see if a pregnancy takes, but without the cramps real or imagined.
Mike finished his "SAFE" Questionnaire, so now we just have to find a doctor to see the whole fam, get fingerprinted, and wait for our criminal background checks to be performed. For me, it will be like sort of like waiting to see if a pregnancy takes, but without the cramps real or imagined.
Saturday, November 04, 2006
McParents
Last night, after my husband got home we hooked our bike trailers up to our bikes, strapped the boys in to their respective spaceships- avec helmets of course- and handed each a baggie of four of miniature candy bars. As the sun was setting in our neck of Suburbia, we pedaled gently toward a neighborhood park that has not a single hill between its domain and ours. Said park has a lamppost- the old timey kind- and it was a full moon or close anyway, so there was plenty of light.
Eldest Son collected seed pods, "to take home and make poddery out of" and we had a little talk about pods, clay, and pottery. The English language can be so confusing!
Baby Son, who isn't a baby at all anymore- nay, not even a toddler- got hit in the face by a swing when his own father carelessly let it go behind him, and that wa when we left.
We went home, packed the bikes into the garage- one on each side of the van so we can hopefully use them more this weekend- packed the kids and the overdue library books into the van, and headed off to have some more indoor McFun.
The first McDonald's we drove by was way too packed, and there were some Dreaded Big Kids there, and they were climbing on the *outside* of the PlayPlace, too, so we just went through the drive-through for some McFood to eat on the way to another less anarchistic McDonald's.
The PlayPlace closer to our house wasn't as crowded so we ventured inside. There were still more Big Kids than we would have normally liked, and they were doing Dangerous Big Kid Things, but their Lone Parents were occasionally yelling at them so it seemed safe enough.
I worked on the DIY Naturals November E-newsletter on the laptop while Daddy supervised the McPlay, and the boys had a jolly good time McClimbing, McCrawling, and McSliding.
Then, on the way home, we had the following discussion:
How cool will it be to have two more McKids in the back of the van?
What would we do if they told us they had two girls who were sisters available?
Hubby said 4 and 8 would be ideal ages.
I said 5 and 1. But I don't really want anyone in diapers.
I can't wait, and I want the kids that no one else wants.
I wonder if our kids will act out to get attention?
Any more kids than 4 and we will need another vehicle.
If this seems random it's because it's Blog One of Five for today, and I haven't had any coffee yet. But I am committed to NaBloPoMo and even though I briefly considered rolling all of my blogs into one yesterday. I think it is best to keep them as separate topics worth delving deeper into. If I were searching for a blog about becoming a foster parenting, I wouldn't want to hear the gory details of the author's reproductive life. Well, actually I would, but I'm weird.
Eldest Son collected seed pods, "to take home and make poddery out of" and we had a little talk about pods, clay, and pottery. The English language can be so confusing!
Baby Son, who isn't a baby at all anymore- nay, not even a toddler- got hit in the face by a swing when his own father carelessly let it go behind him, and that wa when we left.
We went home, packed the bikes into the garage- one on each side of the van so we can hopefully use them more this weekend- packed the kids and the overdue library books into the van, and headed off to have some more indoor McFun.
The first McDonald's we drove by was way too packed, and there were some Dreaded Big Kids there, and they were climbing on the *outside* of the PlayPlace, too, so we just went through the drive-through for some McFood to eat on the way to another less anarchistic McDonald's.
The PlayPlace closer to our house wasn't as crowded so we ventured inside. There were still more Big Kids than we would have normally liked, and they were doing Dangerous Big Kid Things, but their Lone Parents were occasionally yelling at them so it seemed safe enough.
I worked on the DIY Naturals November E-newsletter on the laptop while Daddy supervised the McPlay, and the boys had a jolly good time McClimbing, McCrawling, and McSliding.
Then, on the way home, we had the following discussion:
How cool will it be to have two more McKids in the back of the van?
What would we do if they told us they had two girls who were sisters available?
Hubby said 4 and 8 would be ideal ages.
I said 5 and 1. But I don't really want anyone in diapers.
I can't wait, and I want the kids that no one else wants.
I wonder if our kids will act out to get attention?
Any more kids than 4 and we will need another vehicle.
If this seems random it's because it's Blog One of Five for today, and I haven't had any coffee yet. But I am committed to NaBloPoMo and even though I briefly considered rolling all of my blogs into one yesterday. I think it is best to keep them as separate topics worth delving deeper into. If I were searching for a blog about becoming a foster parenting, I wouldn't want to hear the gory details of the author's reproductive life. Well, actually I would, but I'm weird.
Friday, November 03, 2006
NaBloPoMo
How cool for this new baby blog of mine that it just so happens to be National Blog Posting Month! I'm committed to posting in all five of my blogs each day, until I make them into one!
On November 1, I started filling out the foster family paperwork. It occured to me that over 50% of the people I know who *are* parents wouldn't be certified as foster families for one or more reasons including but not limited to: they spank or otherwise use fear to coerce and manipulate, they don't plan healthy meals, they aren't CPR or First Aid certified, and they have no education or training about child developmental stages.
Now, I need to find a family doc who can see all four of us in one appointment!
On November 1, I started filling out the foster family paperwork. It occured to me that over 50% of the people I know who *are* parents wouldn't be certified as foster families for one or more reasons including but not limited to: they spank or otherwise use fear to coerce and manipulate, they don't plan healthy meals, they aren't CPR or First Aid certified, and they have no education or training about child developmental stages.
Now, I need to find a family doc who can see all four of us in one appointment!
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
The Journey of a Thousand Miles
...begins with one step, says the ancient proverb.
Yesterday was one step of many to come.
Hubby took the day off to work on our website and I took advantage of that opportunity and set up an appointment for us to go in and get the preliminary paperwork to become a foster family. We actually got there early (two hours early, as I had called to reschedule for "earlier in the day" when Hubby decided to take the day off). The Placement Coordinator had called me back and left a message saying it was okay to come in earlier, that he wouldn't be in until 11, but that we could ask for him or someone else if he wasn't there.) I hadn't called him back because the day got away from me. But should I have called him back and said exactly when we were coming earlier in the day? Does that go down in our permanent record, that we said we would come "earlier in the day" and arrived at 2:30? Our original appointment had been for Wednesday at 4:30 (Hubby gets off work at 4). So I had called back to try and get an appointment for earlier in the day on Tuesday (Halloween). The Placement Coordinator had said that was fine. And 2:30 *is* earlier in the day than 4:30, so I guess we're okay.
Argh, see I am already driving myself batty with the paranoia of being scrutinized!
We could have gotten there much earlier in the day, like 10:30 or 11. But we first ran a few errands...to Costco to 1) pick up photos that weren't developed (as the disposable camera given to our four-year-old son for his birthday was "opened and wet"), 2) get Halloween candy that we wouldn't mind eating if we didn't pass it all out (we are getting sooo smart!), and 3) fill up our ginormous gas tank (gas is so cheap right now, I wish we could drive to China to adopt a little girl!); and to Burger King for lunch (and to let our two spirited boys crawl, climb and run out some energy). We had wanted to eat cheaply at Costco but the food place only takes cash and there was guy filling up and/or servicing the ATM when we got to it (and hungry kids are not known for their patience).
I know, I know, I put a lot of stuff in parantheses. It's probably stuff that doesn't even need to be parenthesized, but I just type that way. (I write that way, talk that way, and think that way, too. What are you going to do about it- not read the paranthetic material? Go right ahead!)
So we show up for the appointment, with new activity books for the boys just purchased from Costco (and somewhat like the Addams Family with all of us dressed in black from head-to-toe as we were pre-staging for Halloween festivities!). We were invited into a bright room with windows to sit down at a large table with 8 chairs, and we got the boys settled with their new books (or so we thought). Then the Placement Coordinator came in and went over all of the paperwork and a bit of the process and the timeframe that we could expect on various portions of the process (the criminal background checks alone are taking between 4 to 5 weeks right now).
Hammy pestered me constantly during the brief visit, truly testing my parenting mettle, but when asked what he was going to do for Halloween, appeared as if he was in a comatose state. "Ah, the blank stare of naptime!" I quipped, and our Placement Coordinator laughed. (Notice how I am calling him "our" Placement Coordinator already? I have a really good feeling about this.)
And now, we have a red folder full of paperwork and one unanswered question:
Will we be able to be certified as a foster home even though I have a drug-related (marijuana), first offense (and last offense), nonviolent, class C felony conviction from 15 years ago (my very first time on my own away from home in a small town overpopulated with drugs)?
I told our Placement Coordinator (wow, we really have a Placement Coordinator!) that I have a felony drug conviction and a little bit about the circumstances, and he said he didn't think it would affect our ability to become certified but that it would be up to the Case Worker (most likely, him) who does our home visit. But the paperwork says NO drug convictions and NO felonies.
I can completely understand the law. The thought of *felons* becoming *parents*!
And while I would like to say that I take full responsibility for the so-called crime that I committed (even though I was 19 and still prone to peer pressure and didn't really hurt anyone but myself...yeah, I'm still making excuses), the felony conviction has never stopped me from doing anything I wanted to do (except, of course, for the 4 months that it stopped me from living my life as a free person, and the following 8 months of parole). But it didn't stop me from finishing my degree, or from getting certified as a Nurses Aide, or from getting licensed as a Massage Therapist or nationally certified as an LMT. Alas, my husband (who has a top secret government clearance) has told me many times to apply for a pardon from the governor of the state of Missouri. I haven't done so- probably because it hasn't stopped me from doing anything yet- but maybe it is about time. Maybe it's time to write a letter about how rehabilitated I am.
It really would feel good to put that behind me, especially as we embark on this new adventure.
Yesterday was one step of many to come.
Hubby took the day off to work on our website and I took advantage of that opportunity and set up an appointment for us to go in and get the preliminary paperwork to become a foster family. We actually got there early (two hours early, as I had called to reschedule for "earlier in the day" when Hubby decided to take the day off). The Placement Coordinator had called me back and left a message saying it was okay to come in earlier, that he wouldn't be in until 11, but that we could ask for him or someone else if he wasn't there.) I hadn't called him back because the day got away from me. But should I have called him back and said exactly when we were coming earlier in the day? Does that go down in our permanent record, that we said we would come "earlier in the day" and arrived at 2:30? Our original appointment had been for Wednesday at 4:30 (Hubby gets off work at 4). So I had called back to try and get an appointment for earlier in the day on Tuesday (Halloween). The Placement Coordinator had said that was fine. And 2:30 *is* earlier in the day than 4:30, so I guess we're okay.
Argh, see I am already driving myself batty with the paranoia of being scrutinized!
We could have gotten there much earlier in the day, like 10:30 or 11. But we first ran a few errands...to Costco to 1) pick up photos that weren't developed (as the disposable camera given to our four-year-old son for his birthday was "opened and wet"), 2) get Halloween candy that we wouldn't mind eating if we didn't pass it all out (we are getting sooo smart!), and 3) fill up our ginormous gas tank (gas is so cheap right now, I wish we could drive to China to adopt a little girl!); and to Burger King for lunch (and to let our two spirited boys crawl, climb and run out some energy). We had wanted to eat cheaply at Costco but the food place only takes cash and there was guy filling up and/or servicing the ATM when we got to it (and hungry kids are not known for their patience).
I know, I know, I put a lot of stuff in parantheses. It's probably stuff that doesn't even need to be parenthesized, but I just type that way. (I write that way, talk that way, and think that way, too. What are you going to do about it- not read the paranthetic material? Go right ahead!)
So we show up for the appointment, with new activity books for the boys just purchased from Costco (and somewhat like the Addams Family with all of us dressed in black from head-to-toe as we were pre-staging for Halloween festivities!). We were invited into a bright room with windows to sit down at a large table with 8 chairs, and we got the boys settled with their new books (or so we thought). Then the Placement Coordinator came in and went over all of the paperwork and a bit of the process and the timeframe that we could expect on various portions of the process (the criminal background checks alone are taking between 4 to 5 weeks right now).
Hammy pestered me constantly during the brief visit, truly testing my parenting mettle, but when asked what he was going to do for Halloween, appeared as if he was in a comatose state. "Ah, the blank stare of naptime!" I quipped, and our Placement Coordinator laughed. (Notice how I am calling him "our" Placement Coordinator already? I have a really good feeling about this.)
And now, we have a red folder full of paperwork and one unanswered question:
Will we be able to be certified as a foster home even though I have a drug-related (marijuana), first offense (and last offense), nonviolent, class C felony conviction from 15 years ago (my very first time on my own away from home in a small town overpopulated with drugs)?
I told our Placement Coordinator (wow, we really have a Placement Coordinator!) that I have a felony drug conviction and a little bit about the circumstances, and he said he didn't think it would affect our ability to become certified but that it would be up to the Case Worker (most likely, him) who does our home visit. But the paperwork says NO drug convictions and NO felonies.
I can completely understand the law. The thought of *felons* becoming *parents*!
And while I would like to say that I take full responsibility for the so-called crime that I committed (even though I was 19 and still prone to peer pressure and didn't really hurt anyone but myself...yeah, I'm still making excuses), the felony conviction has never stopped me from doing anything I wanted to do (except, of course, for the 4 months that it stopped me from living my life as a free person, and the following 8 months of parole). But it didn't stop me from finishing my degree, or from getting certified as a Nurses Aide, or from getting licensed as a Massage Therapist or nationally certified as an LMT. Alas, my husband (who has a top secret government clearance) has told me many times to apply for a pardon from the governor of the state of Missouri. I haven't done so- probably because it hasn't stopped me from doing anything yet- but maybe it is about time. Maybe it's time to write a letter about how rehabilitated I am.
It really would feel good to put that behind me, especially as we embark on this new adventure.
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