We're officially licensed!

And I was so incredibly excited to hear the news in a voicemail that I cried out to the boys ("GUYS! WE'RE GONNA BE A FOSTER FAMILY!") who were playing on a six foot pile of sand at the playground on the swim beach at Cherry Creek State Park, and then I immediately called Lance, Mike, and my mom (in that order). Lance wanted to go over with us ages, genders, ethnicity/race, number of children we are willing to take in, et cetera, before adding us to the "Openings List". Our preferences at this time are: Infants or children under the age of two (so as not to usurp Moose's role in the family; Female; Any ethnicity/race; And one baby/child at a time up to two, although we would be willing to consider taking in two at a time if there was a pair of siblings that needed placement (especially if they needed to place a baby girl and say, a three-year-old sister. What a package deal that'd be for us since we want to have two girls!)

Then I woke up the next morning thinking, What have I gotten myself into? Will I be able to take care of another child? Having recently turned thirty-five, and being about seventy-five pounds overweight, I wake up most mornings feeling rusty. I have "severe, widespread" Osteoarthritis, and decreased physical activity due to pain has increased my weight. It's a vicious cycle. I need to be active to take off excess weight from two pregnancies, but it's painful for me to do exercise out of water. I can swim at our subdivision pool in the Summertime, but in the Winter I am limited to the Trails Recreation Center at about $5 a pop (even though it is right down the street, we are "out of district"). And when I'm really active anyway, such as when we go on a long bike ride or hike, I need the next day to recover. I'm only sharing this since it seems to be part of the process and normal, in case anyone else with a medical condition or disability that limits their activity who is considering foster parenting ever reads this.

So now we wait. Again. But for a different phone call. It's a gigantic relief to be licensed, but it doesn't tame the ginormous, wondering part of my mind...

How old is she?

What is her name?

Was she born via Cesarean surgery or a vaginal birth?*

Was she breastfed at all?

Is she sitting up/crawling/walking? Talking?

Will she sleep in a crib (on lay-away) or the co-sleeper (we have)?

Was she abused? Physically? Emotionally? Sexually? All of the above?

What color are her eyes?

Will she like me?

Will the boys accept and love her?

Will we be able to adopt her? How long will that process take?

Will she have any medical issues?

Will I need to take her on a lot of appointments? How will I take the boys, too?

Will there be visitations with family members? if so, how will she handle them?

How will this affect our homeschooling?

Will she be with us for the holidays? Will we have a little trick-or-treater in arms?

Will she be on formula? How will I handle formula-feeding after breastfeeding two children?

Will she let me wear her in my mei tai (sugar skulls by Amy May!!) or Moby Wrap?

Do we need to get a stroller just in case? Which kind? Why did we ever sell our single jogger with fiv-point harness and the movable seat that could face the parent or face out?

Should I beg/borrow/buy a high chair? Swing? Changing table?

Will I need more cloth diapers? Why haven't I sewn the covers I got from diaperkit.com yet?

When will the phone ring again? Is the ringer on? Wait, is that the phone ringing now?!


*Because birth matters...and peace begins at birth...see why I care at: http://www.ican-online.org/