Yesterday was one step of many to come.
Hubby took the day off to work on our website and I took advantage of that opportunity and set up an appointment for us to go in and get the preliminary paperwork to become a foster family. We actually got there early (two hours early, as I had called to reschedule for "earlier in the day" when Hubby decided to take the day off). The Placement Coordinator had called me back and left a message saying it was okay to come in earlier, that he wouldn't be in until 11, but that we could ask for him or someone else if he wasn't there.) I hadn't called him back because the day got away from me. But should I have called him back and said exactly when we were coming earlier in the day? Does that go down in our permanent record, that we said we would come "earlier in the day" and arrived at 2:30? Our original appointment had been for Wednesday at 4:30 (Hubby gets off work at 4). So I had called back to try and get an appointment for earlier in the day on Tuesday (Halloween). The Placement Coordinator had said that was fine. And 2:30 *is* earlier in the day than 4:30, so I guess we're okay.
Argh, see I am already driving myself batty with the paranoia of being scrutinized!
We could have gotten there much earlier in the day, like 10:30 or 11. But we first ran a few errands...to Costco to 1) pick up photos that weren't developed (as the disposable camera given to our four-year-old son for his birthday was "opened and wet"), 2) get Halloween candy that we wouldn't mind eating if we didn't pass it all out (we are getting sooo smart!), and 3) fill up our ginormous gas tank (gas is so cheap right now, I wish we could drive to China to adopt a little girl!); and to Burger King for lunch (and to let our two spirited boys crawl, climb and run out some energy). We had wanted to eat cheaply at Costco but the food place only takes cash and there was guy filling up and/or servicing the ATM when we got to it (and hungry kids are not known for their patience).
I know, I know, I put a lot of stuff in parantheses. It's probably stuff that doesn't even need to be parenthesized, but I just type that way. (I write that way, talk that way, and think that way, too. What are you going to do about it- not read the paranthetic material? Go right ahead!)
So we show up for the appointment, with new activity books for the boys just purchased from Costco (and somewhat like the Addams Family with all of us dressed in black from head-to-toe as we were pre-staging for Halloween festivities!). We were invited into a bright room with windows to sit down at a large table with 8 chairs, and we got the boys settled with their new books (or so we thought). Then the Placement Coordinator came in and went over all of the paperwork and a bit of the process and the timeframe that we could expect on various portions of the process (the criminal background checks alone are taking between 4 to 5 weeks right now).
Hammy pestered me constantly during the brief visit, truly testing my parenting mettle, but when asked what he was going to do for Halloween, appeared as if he was in a comatose state. "Ah, the blank stare of naptime!" I quipped, and our Placement Coordinator laughed. (Notice how I am calling him "our" Placement Coordinator already? I have a really good feeling about this.)
And now, we have a red folder full of paperwork and one unanswered question:
Will we be able to be certified as a foster home even though I have a drug-related (marijuana), first offense (and last offense), nonviolent, class C felony conviction from 15 years ago (my very first time on my own away from home in a small town overpopulated with drugs)?
I told our Placement Coordinator (wow, we really have a Placement Coordinator!) that I have a felony drug conviction and a little bit about the circumstances, and he said he didn't think it would affect our ability to become certified but that it would be up to the Case Worker (most likely, him) who does our home visit. But the paperwork says NO drug convictions and NO felonies.
I can completely understand the law. The thought of *felons* becoming *parents*!
And while I would like to say that I take full responsibility for the so-called crime that I committed (even though I was 19 and still prone to peer pressure and didn't really hurt anyone but myself...yeah, I'm still making excuses), the felony conviction has never stopped me from doing anything I wanted to do (except, of course, for the 4 months that it stopped me from living my life as a free person, and the following 8 months of parole). But it didn't stop me from finishing my degree, or from getting certified as a Nurses Aide, or from getting licensed as a Massage Therapist or nationally certified as an LMT. Alas, my husband (who has a top secret government clearance) has told me many times to apply for a pardon from the governor of the state of Missouri. I haven't done so- probably because it hasn't stopped me from doing anything yet- but maybe it is about time. Maybe it's time to write a letter about how rehabilitated I am.
It really would feel good to put that behind me, especially as we embark on this new adventure.
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